Players should get like five self-hand-gazes per season

This is getting out of hand. Every time a player scores with his weak hand, he holds it out in front of him and stares wide-eyed at it as if he has pulled a magic trick even he cannot believe. It doesn’t matter if the shot is a ho-hum uncontested layup.

I’m not sure who started this trend, but we need a hard per-player limit on it. Overexposure kills the appeal of anything. If James Harden mimed the “I’m cookin'” gesture after every big shot, we’d roll our eyes.

Players should get like five self-hand-gazes per season, and they should be required to save them for high degree of difficulty shots. Drop in a lefty jump hook in traffic, over some big fella’s outstretched arm? Stare at that thing like Bart after the cute neighborhood babysitter spit in his palm. Just don’t overdo it.

The first suspension — after a DUI charge for marijuana possession in August 2014 — infuriated Lisa Bell. For 40-plus years, Lisa kept a dry house for her children. But Bell, she says, has always been her most independent — and impulsive — child: When she told a 5-year-old Bell that he couldn’t reach into the cookie jar on top of the fridge, he scaled the kitchen counters while she wasn’t looking. She wasn’t pleased with this second suspension, either, but she believes her son has remained clean and is passing all of his drug tests.

The whole ordeal was a bit clumsy, but Bell said he wanted his explanation on social media for a moment, not forever.

“[The Steelers] know I’m not a bonehead,” Bell says. “I just had some things I had to improve on. I understand now that I’m representing my family, my team and the people around me. Things are magnified now. I maybe didn’t realize all the way at first.”

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